Saturday, January 2, 2016

What If...

hi!!!

What if I did hard in my studies,
Will I still stand with my knees,
Will I have to work like the bees,
Will my life have peace?

What if I did well in the exams,
Will I have bright lamps,
Will I have someone to fly me over the jams,
Will I have maids instead of ma'ams?

What if I were successful,
Will my life be wonderful,
Will my life be colourful,
Instead of pitiful?

What if I were chosen,
Among the princes in billion,
Will I get the love of red hot crimson,
Or will your heart eventually get frozen?

I am already at the edge of the cliff,
Looking at the only fallen leaf,
I have nothing more to believe,
As there is only 'what if'...

Saturday, November 21, 2015

2 Years of Silence

hi!!!

2 years have just passed. Many moments just went through unwritten. I am doing fine currently and of course, I am already a workaholic. Start work at 7++ am and leave my workplace at 10pm. Some said youngsters need to work more to learn more and have a bright future ahead. Some told me we should enjoy when we are young as we cannot enjoy as much as we are young when we are old. Confusing huh?

I am just wondering how long can this lifestyle last. Should I just go home early? I am still wondering will I regret in future. Being a mechanical design engineer in factory automation field was never in my thought as my ambition. I am not joking. My all time ambition is to go into the M & E field in which you can see engineers wearing white safety helmet looking at the huge engineering drawing. To me, that's very cool.

Too bad that I am in the totally different field from what I aimed several years ago. It just started with a call for me to go to an interview and I just went there for a try. The whole new journey starts from there. What if I didn't take up this job? What will I be now? Will I be wearing the white helmet?

Of course, among all the engineering fields, factory automation (machine designing) has a lot of opportunities in my hometown. I can simply see vacancies whenever I step out from my factory. What can you conclude from this? Demand is higher than supply :) So? Am I really so valuable? Not really because I still have many stuffs to learn. Hopefully, I can be the one with extremely broad knowledge and creativity as well as experience. 2 years of working experience won't bring me there anywhere near there.

It's Saturday and this blog is from my workstation. I've told you earlier that I am a workaholic. I realised that I take my job too seriously. I always want my machine to be the perfect one. I know it is impossible to please everyone with a design but I am still trying to do it. Stupid? Maybe. If I am smart, I won't be working today. In fact, I will be enjoying the day :P

Of course, being too serious is not a good stuff. Clashes of ideas and I don't talk to everybody in my factory now. You can't blame me. I tried to talk back after the clash but, you know... I tried but ... maybe they took it too personally.

Even my blog is about my work. Hahaha...that's all. Hope to write down sweet moments in the coming days.


-steam-

Saturday, July 6, 2013

A Change for Life

hi!!!


Finally, I am in my working life. Being an employee for a week and I started to miss my life as a student. One of the most annoying change is to wake up EXTREMELY early. Then comes to traffic congestion which you can always see people putting their cars in the MIDDLE of the yellow boxes. Well, I have no choice but to wake up extra early to escape from the jam.

Well, my job needs a lot of inspiration as I am now a mechanical design engineer. The job is basically about designing a device structure and its mechanism. So, being sleepy is a devastating state. All I need is a calm and creative and innovative mind, I guess. The job is quite tough especially for the freshies like me as experience is a great contribution to the design job.

I was introduced to a senior and I have great respect for him. I can see a lot of knowledge and experience in him and he is quite funny as I always hear him laughing with very low tone.I can say my manager is good also. He always 'jio' me to lunch together and 'belanja' me once. LOL!  And my manager is a funny guy. I hope my enjoyment working with them will carry on.

But my first day of work was ALL about photostating == DAMN BORING!

Things change after that as I was given a designing task and I haven't complete it yet. Hahaha..the method I used during my undergraduate life is not a so called 'valid' method for the designing task. I guess I have so many brand new things to learn. And so many things that I have forgotten are important towards my design ==

I guess til here for now.


-steam-

Friday, May 17, 2013

The worst project!

hi!!!

It has been almost half year since I last blogged. The number of view is declining. Anyway, let's get straight to the point. I am in deep shit. I guess not many will experience this kind of shit but there will be some or a few. To those who had been in this shit, I wonder how you guys faced this kind of shit.

Here goes the shit. I am doing my final year project. Since the beginning of the project, I thought I will be doing at least okay but not that way. With my current supervisor, I am extremely stressed! At first I did not really wanted to choose his title as his attitude and behaviour is rather weird. Anyhow, he told me he will guide me and he offered me a copy of senior's thesis. That made me to change my mind. I took his title!

From that moment, shit has gone worse and worse. There were a few times which he was absent during our appointment for the project discussion. The problem is, he set the time and day all by himself and I agreed with it but he was NOT there! There was once in which I needed to go to his office for 3 times just to meet him ONCE! He didn't even apologize and act like he did not do anything wrong.

Secondly, he told me I have to plan a meeting with him to discuss and not simply go to him and ask questions. I am fine with it since this is his preference. However, most of the time I told him my problem and asked for guidance, he just answered, "That is not my problem. You have to find out yourself!" What kind of guidance is this?

Next, his English sucks! Although mine is not perfect but I am sure mine is much more better than his. Sometimes I don't understand what's his talking about and I asked, he showed me a black face and replied with a unpleasant tone, "You still don't understand!" Of course,man! What the hell?

He told me to do a few tasks and I did them but in the end, he told me to do another brand new thing again. Imagine how much time and effort has been wasted. And then, he said I was doing a last minute job. He doesn't like to go straight to the point.

Right now, I am still blur with my goal and objective of the project. I just did my best and hope for the best. That is nothing much I can do right now as I had make a very huge mistake at my first step. Oh ya! I just forked out around 850 bucks and he told me I can claim back with the maximum amount of 500 bucks and it is not guaranteed that I will get back the maximum amount of 500 bucks. What does that mean? Wait and see. All I need now is hope and miracle.

I kept this problem away from my family members. Letting them know will definitely worry them. I hope I am strong enough to walk this path alone and I am really having a stressed moment right now. I dreamed of my project when I was sleeping. The first thing and last thing on my mind will always be my project. I just need some guidance. It is that hard? I just wanna know what he really wants.

I really envy those with very caring supervisors. Some of my friends told me how good their supervisors treated them. Why I am not sharing the same supervisors with them?

Hopefully I will grow stronger...

-steam-




Thursday, December 6, 2012

Fallen Leaf

hi!!!

From the start, at the ground,
I was nobody as I was deep down,
There was no room for a frown,
As the Earth is always round.

Step by step, I strove to grow,
Looking up, there was at least a crow,
Just move ahead and follow the flow,
In every life, there is sorrow.

I was able to reach the stars that glow,
Soon, many came to borrow,
Sometimes from head to toe,
Until the sky started to throw.

Until the day I am not in the map,
I can't help with the gap,
No money, for sure no cab,
Day by day, I am here for others to step...



-steam-

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Engineering Student

hi!!!

They said my future will be very bright,
Full of colours with beautiful light,
Girls will look at me like a mighty knight,
However, I am struggling in the fight.

Missing home so much that I almost drop a tear,
And yet home is so near,
So many holidays throughout the year,
In the battlefield, I am still here.

I know this is crazy,
No companion and I am so lonely,
All I can do is study and study,
Sometimes, copy and copy.

I am still waiting for my lady,
Girls here are a few but some are pretty,
Til now, nobody wanna date me,
I know it sounds very pity.

Assignments come in so sudden,
Test is another form of burden,
Not forgetting project and presentation,
Welcome to the life of an engineering student.


-steam-

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Fate, Fade..

hi!!!

Things are no longer the same,
Blazing red flame has already been tamed,
Only memories are in the frame,
I am the one for you to blame.

Tears are dripping,
My heart has stopped thinking,
Cupid is no longer helping,
The moment it started fading.

Things have gone from bad to worse,
You can no longer quench my thirst,
I don't mind how you scold or even curse,
But why did it start at first?

I guess everything is fated,
You were the only one I dated,
Sorry for all the time wasted,
As my love towards you has faded...


-steam-

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Relationship~

hi!!!


A spark for the feel to burn,
She is the only answer no matter how you turn,
To love her I don't even need to learn,
When I have it, it becomes a burden.

I tried to lighten the burden slowly,
There is no way to lighten it nicely,
Once gone, I thought I can live freely,
But when I lose it, I become lonely.


-steam-

Sunday, June 3, 2012

You Left

hi!!!


From the moment that you didn't reply,
I knew that you had gone way up too high,
You didn't even say goodbye,
And I thought I can at least see you fly...

-steam-

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Study Week~~~~~

hi!!!

Here comes the study week!!!! STUDY LO!!!!


-steam-

Saturday, May 26, 2012

How?

hi!!!

How would it be if I am a star?
Destined to be travelling far,
On the sand, on the tar,
By plane and also by car.

How would it be if I am a beggar,
Always and always a loner,
Coping with hunger,
Hoping tomorrow will be better.

How would it be if I am dead,
Will I accept it as my fate?
Do I need to find the gate?
Will I get punished if I am late?

How would it be if I am a newborn,
Will I get the rose or the torn?
Will it be the dusk or dawn,
How long will it be before I am gone?



-steam-




Globe of Life and Death

hi!!!

Deep down with a sigh,
Maybe there is no chance to reply,
And what about saying goodbye,
When the ocean one day run dry?

No matter how high we fly,
We will never own the sky,
The God still hasn't answer why,
From the Earth we were born, to the Earth we die...


-steam-

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

About to start...

hi!!!


Tests are coming and final presentation is almost here. Finals are next. Time to get serious.... Will update IF there is time :)


-steam-

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

In!

hi!!!

Yes! I AM FINALLY IN! In steaming page of course. It's very hard to log into my account to blog and I wonder why. It's either the connection problem or the bug in my lappie. Anyhow, since I am here already, I apologize for this super late update due to logging in problem.

Recently busy with my design project (which I HATE A LOT!) and studies. After getting my finger dislocated, I'd lost the courage to be the goalkeeper even for a match. I just played once with friends shooting at the goal but not the real match. I wonder when can I play a match, A REAL MATCH?!

I am into Ultimate Frisbee now but still I find goalkeeping is the best. I just have to wait til I am ready to stand in between the posts again. Besides that, studies are not going good as I have many question marks whenever I open my books. They just keep on coming and I have to handle them with care, GENTLY! Weeks into finals and I hope I can have the touch of my previous semester or even better :)

One unforgettable memory....
2 friends and I were trying to drill a wood plank and the hole is big of course. While drilling, the whole drill bit dropped off and I was the last one to leave the scene. Not really leaving actually. What I did was searching for the emergency button or the stop button and  I pressed it at a very high frequency. Thinking back, should I run with them or do as what I did? We were lucky enough to laugh after the incident, you know, guys are like that :)

One thing I noticed is ladies in my campus got more beautiful. Keep up the good work babes :P


-steam-

Monday, March 26, 2012

Bo Dai Ji (300th Post)

hi!!!

(Hokkien)

Ko chek gao, ai bat ji,
Ga ga ki, bo dai ji,
Luan luan gong, seh orh gi,
Dui chu hua hi, gok mm si.

Ju tak ju che, jin chu bi,
Bo beng pek, tun lok ki,
Chui bo seh, jin chao bi,
Tak bo liao, ki kua hi.

Kua ga liao, bak jiu bi,
Ai tak chek, bo lat ki,
Zhao ki kun, mai chap ee,
Ga ga ki, bo dai ji!


没问题


考试到,要认字
敢敢去,没问题
乱乱说,生黑痣
回家欢喜,也不是

越读越多,真可爱
不明白,吞下去
口没洗,真臭味
读不完,去看戏

看到完, 眼睛痲
要读书,没有力
跑去睡,不要理
敢敢去,没问题


-steam-

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Missing it...

hi!!!

I am seriously sad about not being able to play football for at least 3 months. Watching football highlights makes me crave....
Life seems to be miserable....

-steam-

Thursday, March 22, 2012

To Save a Goal...20/3/2012

hi!!!


It was a beautiful evening where everybody was shooting the ball to hit the back of the net and I was there to guard the posts. Then we shifted to play a match and then, the day turned dark.

The ball was rolling towards my right and I was chasing the ball together with another player that was opposing me. We ran so fast to challenge each other. I slid to my right and I reach the ball first. I slapped the ball out of his way to prevent his from reaching the ball. However, something hit my right hand and I was lying in pain. I think it was his leg that kicked my hand. It took me around half a minute to realize that I had a dislocated right thumb.

MY THUMB WAS DISLOCATED!!!!!

Seriously, I was very scared. Many questions came into my mind?

Will I be able to use my right hand again like usual?
Will I be able to play as a goalkeeper again?
Is there any test or assignment?

Then, I heard ' Hospital! Hospital! '

Before I reach the car of my mate, things started to get white and black. I thought to myself that I am going to faint. If I faint, will things get worse? At instance, I sat down and colours began to appear. During the journey to the hospital, the pain was haunting me. I was getting more and more nervous as I know to get my thumb relocated will be extremely painful.

I reached there and I got a shot to my left tie. Before I got the shot, the doctor checked my hand and then...

Doctor: Sini rasa ka? sakit?
Me: sini saja sakit.
Doctor: ada pengsan ka?
Me: Tengok putih lo..tak pengsan...
Doctor: PUTIH?! blackout saya tau la...putih panggil whiteout ka?
Me: =='''' boleh bagi apa yang tak sakit ar?
Doctor: Nanti saya bagi ubat tahan sakit la...lepas tu X ray..mungkin tarik la lepas itu
Me: X ray? bukan dislocate saja meh?
Doctor: Mau tengok dulu...takut patah atau tulang hancur...
Me: ( HANCUR????!!!!  NOOOOOO~~~~~) ini macam boleh hancur meh?
Doctor: tak tau...tengok dulu la...bagi sure...
Me: k lo....tarik itu sakit ar?
Doctor: @@''' Sakit sikit la...
Me: sakit macam mana?
Doctor: nanti u tau...
Me: CHAM LIAO!!!!

Nurse: Lai check badan dulu...Saya mau kepit ibu jari....u tahan har...mau ambik heartbeat...
Me: OUCH! tangan kiri tak boleh ar?
Nurse: Ya hor...sorry sorry..boleh boleh..

TROLLED~~~~~

Here's the conversation between me and the Mr Jab.

Jab: Lu mau saya suntik mana. Sini atau sini ( left or right butt) Saya tanya lagi skali, sini pun boleh, sini, sini atau sini?
Me: Mana yang tak sakit?
Jab: Sumua pun sakit...
Me: WTF!!!! Lu sudah xpert kan? lu rasa mana paling tak sakit...sana lo...
Jab: ok la....Ambik sini la....

...............
No pain~~~~~ I GOT TROLLED!

The shot was to reduce my pain but it left my left thigh to be less sensitive where as my thumb was still in pain T.T

There was a man that said to me, " habis la! Nanti tangan kena potong..."
I felt it was the end of my life but I saw him smiling like shit!

TROLLED AGAIN!!!!


I waited for 2 hours to get the X-ray. Before that, there was a man with broken leg. His X ray was seriously frightening me. I can see the bone that got separated. Then, I thought to myself...What if mine is also the same? Worse? HOW?!!

Then mine showed a cm dislocation. The doctor was like, " Satu cm saja. Sikit saja la...tarik sekejap saja..."

Doctor: Sekarang saya bagi ubat boleh ngantuk atau tidur...lu tinggal mana? ada orang hantar?
Me: Kawan lo...wa tanya kawan dulu...tapi tak mau tidor boleh ar? Takut susah..
Someone: Ini kena, mesti ini macam...kalau tak, we nanti apa pun tak bagi...kita tarik, lu jerit...
Me: @@!!!! NO CHOICE!

Nurse: lai mali..lu boleh sign ka?
Me: HAR???!!! tak boleh la
Nurse: Lai cop saja...tangan kanan...
Me: Tangan kanan mana boleh..sakit la...wei...tolong la...tak boleh la...kiri la..sama kan?
Nurse: U tahan la...
Me: WTF!!!
Nurse: Doctor...tangan kiri boleh ar?
Doctor: Ok la...cincai la...ambik la..

Then I got injected again. This time was the intravenous shot. Wow! Slightly pain. I don't know who was that man but I think he is the medical assistant or houseman.

Man: Sakit?
Me: Sakit lo..
Man: Ini macam sakit ar?? jarum kecik saja...besar lagi ada lo..
Me: HAR??!!! lagi mau suntik besar ar?
Man: Takda...cakap saja...besar lagi ada tapi lu punya ini saja...

..........
Wow....the bed was flying....metal bar changed shape. I thought I am going to faint but......Everything was back to normal =='''


The man with the broken leg was beside me...SCREAMING IN PAIN!!! At instance, I am super conscious !

Then I thought to myself, this is only dislocation. What if I am really dying? Will it be extremely terrible? Life is really full of pain. Then, I thought of my friends outside. What if I dose off and how long must them wait? Will I trouble them for them to carry me to my bed? All sorts of nonsense until....

Man: lu memang tak mau tidor jugak hor? Nanti saya tarik lu sakit...
Me: Bukan tak mau tidor...tepi orang jerit..takut ma....tak boleh tidor...
Man: ok ok...double dose...ini kali lu teruk la...

......
No effect.....

Man: lu memang tak boleh tidor hor? Takpa...ini kali ubat lain....lu pasti tidor...
Me: (YES!! No more pain if I can go unconscious!)

....
No effect...

Man: Lai mali...lu tak boleh tidor..tarik saja la...
Me: (Ho se liao...cham liao)

2 people was there to press me down. The pain was unbearable. Then, my right hand was let go by him.

Me: Ok liao ar?
Man: Sorry sorry....belum..

TROLLED~~~~~

He took my X ray....

Man: Lu tendon kuat tau...mesti lawan tendon...Ok...lai...
Me: (Tendon kuat is a good thing or bad thing? )........(Screaming like shit)

......
Man: Lu try tengok boleh gerak ar?
Me: ok...boleh liao...thank u har...


Seriously I am very grateful to have such mates as they rushed me to hospital without any thought.. Thanks so much!

-steam-




Thursday, March 8, 2012

Angels of the Earth

hi!!!

Brought down from the heaven,
No silence but they are golden,
With their magic in sudden,
Hearts will become molten.

Most are polite and few are rude,
From the sound of saxophone to the high pitched flute,
Totally impossible to predict their mood,
That's why they are not meant to be understood.

Their minds are never clear,
Some of them even live in fear,
So timid and cute like a deer,
Feelings are concentrated in the tear.

Embedded with cotton nerve,
Barricaded hearts that are so hard to surf,
Sometimes direct, sometimes they sway in a curve,
However, they are meant to be loved...


-steam-

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

2 relax...

hi!!!

Currently, my life is not that busy as I thought. Maybe it's too soon for that. But, I really need to buck up my spirit and my love towards engineering books. Recently, I feel like there are so few assignments and something is not so right. Moreover, the design project seems to take a light start. I thought of having no time to blog during this kind of period of my semester. Maybe later.

Rainy season is owning the west coast of peninsula Malaysia and this is certainly a good time to study and prepare to learn whatever possible before the design project starts to eat up my time. Studying with the cooling breeze is so wonderful. However, I didn't study that much. In fact I went for sports and games. What the hell am I doing? I just hope that I won't regret like most of my semesters. I am hoping to hit the jackpot again, again and again before I graduate....

NO MORE TO REJECTION!



-steam-

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Going Down...

hi!!!

It's a downturn in my life. I thought I can have a step closer towards my dream but, it is still far beyond my reach. Maybe I am pessimistic but still, there is not much hope for me. What else can I do?
Try harder? Give up? I seriously don't know.

Moreover, this semester is not an easy semester for me. It will be a very cramp and busy semester. I know myself well. I am not a clever student. Time is a very important factor for me. Repeating what I did last semester is not a wrong choice but the fun is not there. What I did last semester was really something that amazed me. I bought a book and read it during the first week of the semester. Even during the weekend, I still faced the book. I put away most of my leisure time to study. And I got teased by my friends. Some will even say, ' Study so much, but you still know nothing!' I know I am stupid! I just have to face the fact and go on. To maintain my happy go lucky status, I just smiled with some nice reply of course. Actually, some of the comments hurt me quite terribly.
Right now, I feel it is worthy. Being the dean list holder which was my aim when I first step into the life of tertiary education came true after I put in all my blood, sweat and tears into it. It took me 3 years to achieve that and I know this is nothing new to most of the students.

But to get another dean certificate is not easy for me. I just wasted my first two weeks of my current semester without studying much. In fact, I had fun with my friends which now I feel a little bit of regret. If I studied for the past 2 weeks, I won't feel much of the stress. Well, it's only a 'maybe'.

Going back to the downturn in my life. I just noticed that I know what my ambition really is. At first, I told myself that I wanna be an engineer. But, what kind of engineer? That's the question that took years to find out the answer.

Since I know the answer, I tried to find the training I needed to graduate which is related to my ambition. Unfortunately, I think I screwed up and I need to accept another offer which is not really what I want for the time being. If I get the training that I aimed for, maybe I know what should I do to improve myself for the job. But, I feel that I am the man for the job since my personality suits the job related to troubleshooting and creativity. In short, gone case!

So? It's time to study hard like last semester and being teased as a nerd. I don't wanna study so hard actually. But I just need to in order to improve my CGPA. I don't hope to graduate with a poor pointer. I don't hope to lose my golden opportunity to realise my dream just because of a low CGPA.


If you are reading this, thank you because you have at least understood part of me.




-steam-